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Jurai Darongkamas, 2020. Obituary for William David “Bill” Bell Thoughts on his passing Jurai Darongkamas for MCAT. Reformulation, Summer, pp.49-50.
We were all stunned and greatly saddened by the sudden loss of our dear colleague, Bill.
He died in June 2019, aged 56, after a period of an onslaught of several ill-health problems which, to an outsider, appeared to have a relatively sudden onset. However, most people did not know, he had a period of life-threatening ill health as a young man and that had left its mark on him, both physically and psychologically.
Bill was a relatively private individual who was an all-round lovely man. He was an active listener, unfailingly helpfully supportive to others (most of whom felt safe and secure in his containing, sensitive, supportive, reliable, warm, accepting, patient stance). He was compassionate and generous in his sharing of his time and of his self.
Trained as a Clinical Psychologist in 1998, Bill was also a CAT Psychotherapist, Trainer & Supervisor. He was also an accredited therapist in Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR). He worked for the NHS for over 17 years, saw numerous complex patients and helped numerous team members and trainees. He was the sort of colleague, therapist and supervisor that others aspire to be.
Admired by colleagues for his clinical wisdom; he stood out as able and willing to work with complex clients who had struggled most with trauma throughout their lives. Bill seemed able to help clients at the right time to be ready to take on and grow from therapeutic interventions.
A clear thinker, Bill helped others with their thinking; the person who could consider a general, as yet unarticulated view or gut reaction of colleagues or a team, and either help you then and there to crystallise your thinking or take it away and return with a well-argued treatise, supported by theory and references.
He was theoretically inquisitive and reflective; stimulated intellectually by various ways that psychological theory could help people, what they had in common, what was unique about different approaches and how they could be combined at a theoretical level. He was moved to think through things clearly and deeply, made to critique but always in a helpful, thoughtful manner. He wrote well too. The most recent research he completed was on alliance ruptures.
In the West Midlands, Bill led the seminar groups for the Practitioner Course. He was conscientious and performed his role diligently. In conjunction with the other seminar leader, the reading lists were prepared with such thoroughness and thought.
As a clinical supervisor, he created a safe space where people felt very comfortable in being honest and open and learnt a great deal from him. He was also involved in clinical psychology courses and other CAT training courses, including IRRAPT and with colleagues from voluntary sector organisations, including St Basil’s.
Bill had his way of doing things or had to do things in his way (when he wasn’t co-working with others). He loved/liked to be prepared. We saw his programme for teaching, with time allowed for each item – down to the minute. Yet he was prepared to leave his comfort zone when working with others who had a more flexible style. He managed to go with the flow well enough. Even though he was probably stressed underneath, he didn’t show it.
Bill took time to greet you well giving an air of acceptance of both your strengths and needs. He demonstrated through his actions that while you can excel in some area, its okay to admit that you need others’ help in other areas.
The wellbeing of his clients was prioritised until the end, balancing this with his responsibilities, being aware of such issues as fitness to practice. Bill also displayed nurturing to others, such as the struggling student or team colleague. He always took his work seriously but didn't take himself so.
Bill didn’t boast to work colleagues that he had musical talent and that he had made recordings of his own songs many years ago. Nor did he boast that he could cycle for many miles. In fact, he was a talented musician; contributing guitar, mandolin, fiddle and vocals to a number of Bristol based bands in the mid-eighties to early nineties, before moving to Birmingham to embark on clinical psychology training. In recent years Bill`s main passion was for endurance cycling; spending many winter hours training for summer road trips. In the summer of 2018, he was thrilled to have completed a solo cycling and camping trip through southern France as this had long been an ambition. Bill also had a delicious sense of humour.
It has been difficult to reconcile what we have long known of Bill - the professional psychologist and psychotherapist - with what we now also know of his private suffering. Perhaps his skill in focussing on others` needs facilitated this. This leaves us perhaps with having to accept there may be unanswered questions about his decision to end his life. We have to deal with our own feelings about that. I am not alone in feeling bereft. However, I do feel that he made the world a better place for having been here.
I thought this would be so hard to write but not at all. Bill was a quiet man, who perhaps didn’t blow his own trumpet enough. He deserves this recognition and so much more.
The funeral took place on July 17th and was well attended. His wife requested that attendance was limited to include family, friends and close colleagues to enable a more personal and intimate event to take place. A commemorative event in Bill's memory was held on 6th November and was open widely to additional professional colleagues.
Bill leaves behind his wife, family, friends and many colleagues and patients he has helped over the years. We miss you Bill.
Bill's wife, Rachel, has given permission for this to be published in Reformulation in his memory.
Jurai Darongkamas